My "Spice Girl" turns THREE

Our Liliana Grace MinQin Swindler the day after we "got" her.

Wow, just a little under two years ago we were preparing to travel to China for the second time to bring home our little girl, Liliana. The story of how we had come to this point is a miracle within itself and one I told so many I was going to write about soon, and soon became well, a long time ago. Maybe someday...soon. Anyway, it is hard to believe that we have had her to hold and comfort and tickle and feed and change and cry with and everything else you can imagine for almost two whole years.

Lili is such an interesting little person. She has such a wonderful personality full of drama and emotion full of drama. She can't just say something, it has to be dramatic and full of emotion. She loves this way too. When she hugs, she really hugs. When she kisses, she has to land right on target or she will hold your cheeks to make sure she does. What ever she does, it is full of intention and not necessarily thought out to the end but nonetheless, done with full emotion and you guessed it. DRAMA

Our little beauty a few days after we adopted her.

Her relationship to us began that way, she would cry forever. We of course thought it was because of well, the adoption, separation from familiar surroundings etc. We looked for whatever way we could to understand and appease and comfort and finally just had to admit that we didn't know why but we would just have to let her cry. It used to kill me. It made me so mad that I could not find a way to "fix" it.

Look at that face. A wonderful personality to go with it too.

It has helped me to understand a bit more the serenity prayer of accepting the things I cannot change. The courage to change the things I can and most importantly, the wisdom to know the difference. Knowing that "fixing" everything is not my "to do" list is a freeing feeling. My little girls have helped me a lot in that area of life. They are such a blessing.

Just as every child changes the lives of those around them, Lili has changed ours. Sometimes in subtle ways, sometimes in major ways but always in the end in a blessed way. I am confident that this is what my Father had planned before He laid the foundation of the earth. His ability to work things out still amazes me even though I know He can, my impatience usually gets the best of me and I forget how much He loves me. He continues to try and help me learn each day as I grow to love my wife and my girls even more than I did the day before.

My little astronauts, showing off their Endeavor t-shirts.

When I travelled with the band and sang for a living, or should I say for an existence, we used to sing this song, "I love you more today than yesterday". We probably did it hundreds of times and it got to be old, so old but at the time I did not understand the deep meaning in the lyric. Now as I sing it to my girls sometimes it makes so much sense. It is a love song of course and some of the lyrics say "I love you more today than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow".

Such loving devoted sisters. (but they can be mean to each other too)

As each day comes and goes, I can't imagine that to be true, but I find it is. Somehow my heart must be made of similar material as the Grinch's whose heart was able to grow. Mine grows each day albeit just a small amount, to hold the love I find growing for my family, day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment.

And then somebody pisses me off ...

and well... ;-)

Just teasing. Nobody reads this anyway.

When Lili is old enough to understand my sarcasm she will laugh. A lot.

Love,

I'm back.....oh my aching BACK!!

Greetings friends and family and whoever you are who stops in to read what this crazy old fat man has to say about life and love and whatever is on my heart today! Now look at how I rhymed that so well. If it were a song it would sound swell. Oh no. I am stuck in this rhyming theme. Maybe it will go away and I can just believe it was a dream.
OK, I am sure you are rolling your eyes by now and wondering what kind of extra curricular drugs I am taking these days. I assure you I have been on some drugs and they have had me a little loopy but praise God I am off of them now and all I take is a little Advil these days so my joints won't hurt so much and that is usually at bedtime.
Anyway, I was taking the muscle relaxers because I pulled a muscle in my back and I mean I PULLED a muscle. Shelley said you could see it ball up and just do a wavy kind of thing. All I know is I am a grown man and I was crying it hurt so much. I had to get my little girls to leave the room because I didn't want them to see me in that much pain. Oh my gosh it was sooooo painful and I could not get it to stop seizing up on me. If I breathed in it seized up. If I breathed out it seized up, if I looked left, or lifted my little pinkie on my right hand....yep you got it, it seized up. I don't know what I would have done if it had not been for my loving wife who rubbed tiger balm on me and icy hot and just loved me through it. She has been having her own bout of pain with some nerve problems from her neck affecting her knees. Go figure. It is all due to that little fender bender back last September when it tore something in her neck and she is still suffering as a result. Please remember her in your prayers and say a "thank you" to Him for healing my poor back. Boy I tell you, I am careful, careful, careful now.
Let's see, why did I decide to blog today. Well, I think it was because I am putting off an assignment that I don't want to do right yet but I will get to it soon enough. For anyone who cares and does not know I am attending Liberty University through their Distance Learning Program to finish my Bachelors Degree. It really has been interesting and fun and my family and I are very excited about it. I am doing very well, praise God and am staying ahead of the game this time.
The whole system has changed since I attempted to finish my degree through their system about three years ago. Back then you bought a lot of tapes and DVDs and watched at your own pace and took tests whenever. Well, for me while working at the Children's Home did not work so well because I procrastinated terribly. Needless to say I had to withdraw because I let the work build up on me too much.
This go round they have changed. Everything is on line. I take my exams on line. I submit papers on line and listen to audio lectures online and can search the web while listening to see visuals that the professor is talking about in the class with his overheads! It is really amazing. I am also so excited that I really WANT to learn this stuff. Not like when I was in college my first 8 years (ha ha). I am interested in the information and I get to bore Shelley with it. Actually she says she enjoys learning stuff from me as I am a verbal or auditory learner and retain more information if I repeat it aloud. We are also amazed at how God has lead me to this and is combining all of the classes to teach me things that work together.
For example, I am ending up my class on Humanities which has taught me a great deal about the history of the western world through the lens of art and architecture. It has taught me a lot about the time when Christ came to earth. The fullness of time. How perfect it was for Him to be born when He was. This info goes in line with what I am studying in my Theology class etc.
SO, I am quite sure you are bored with this but for me it is a wonderful exciting window to a new career possibility for me and a more secure future for my family. I sure know my father in law appreciates it.

I am putting these pictures of my heart in here so you can see how well they are adjusting to sharing a bed, and a room. We were going to set up Lili in her toddler bed but then we realized that Aly hated to sleep alone she was soooo used to sleeping with us, which although I loved the closeness I was loving sleep a little more. So we moved Lili into Aly's room and they LOVE it. Such devoted sisters who love each other to pieces.

Here they are getting ready to go to sleep. They play a little and pray for each other and after Mom reads to them they slowly drift away.
And look at how they show their love for each other even in their sleep. God love em!! I sure do!!

Well, I am tired and sleepy and just wanted to say hello to everyone. Please leave me a comment or two to let me know you are still reading. I will try to post more often with more interesting info. More about my little heart beats. They are so wonderful. And the one who keeps me going, actually keeps us all going around here, my beautiful pacemaker-Shelley. I love you my dear!
Till next time.

What is Talent?

Greetings to all two of you who read my blog. I am thrilled once again to share with you what is on my heart today. As I listen to the remarkable talent of the artist Yo Yo Ma as he caresses the stings of his cello I am overwhelmed with appreciation to our God for the remarkable gifts He bestows. Having been a musician or a "music maker" for much of my life I cannot imagine life without that beautiful touch. I was once asked if I had to choose, would I rather be deaf or blind. Of course I choose blind, although that would be a terrible loss within and of itself, I would not want to imagine a world without sound. I can re create in my minds eye pictures and imaginings of what I might see, however I don't believe I could conceive the beauty that is found in sound, especially music.

Oh the talent in that man's hands and heart!

What is talent? How do you determine what a talent is? I know that when I witness someone accomplishing something that I cannot, more often than not I attribute that as a talent that person has. Regardless of whether or not it is considered by the public in general as a talent.

For example, our friend Mariya. We met Mariya when the Lord directed her to us some months ago. When we moved to St. Augustine we had to combine two households. AND we were moving into one that had not been properly up kept for a few years due to Shelley's parents decline in health. The floors were an absolute mess and the bathrooms were even worse. Shelley and I talked about it and prayed about it and although we really could not afford it we decided to try to find some college student or independent worker (not with a cleaning service) to come and help us get the house in some semblance of clean. God lead us right to Mariya.

She is originally from Ukraine and has been here in America for a little over three years. Although her English is not what she would like it to be, she really is amazing to have learned it totally by just living here and trusting God. Which she does... with a talent.

What I was going to say when I began to write about Mariya was that she has a definite talent to clean. And clean well she really does. And I know clean, having once owned and worked in a house cleaning business. But truly her talent lies in trusting God. Every day that she comes to our home (once a week for a few hours)she greets us with such a smile and loving concern for us. She never fails to somehow tell us how "My God" has taught her something or given her strength for some struggle or lead her day in such a special way.

She has a talent for living her faith. A talent for lifting up our Heavenly Father through her attitude and efforts. Sure she is "working" but sometimes you would never know it. She loves to chat in her fourth language (she knows Polish, Russian, Ukrainian, and English)because she considers it a challenge as she continues to learn. She does so well but she thinks she has so far to go. Perhaps but her talent for desiring to be better is certainly contagious.

My girls also have a talent. Actually I am sure there are several talents they possess. Many from Shelley I see every day but my little girls have talents that are as yet untapped and I am anxious to see them blossom. Their most amazing talent that I recognize these days is their talent to make my day so much brighter. So much more worthwhile.

I love them so.

Can you tell?!

I am among men most wonderfully blessed.

Love,

Hey Fay!!

I am a virgin. I will admit it. Here and now I admit that even having been married to Shelley for 13 plus years I am still a virgin... a Tropical Storm/Hurricane virgin. And I was hoping to stay one my entire life but apparently I will be losing my cherry so to speak in the next several hours. So will my little beauties and our little faithful dog Bailey.
We have "battened down the hatches" and secured as much as we can secure and are sitting here praying and waiting. We are praying that the power doesn't go out and if it does it doesn't stay out for too terribly long. It will be miserable here with no air. We have no screens on the windows and I would rather be hot than donate a lot of blood to the mosquitoes. Not to mention Aly and Lili would go into a coma with a lot of bites SO if the power does leave us we will just grin and sweat and bear it.
Sorry any of you out there who don't get the thrill of waiting to go through a Tropical Storm or Hurricane. I am hoping to win the blog cabin on DIY network so we can move back to TN and won't have to deal with any of this mess. Just good ole snow.
Anyway, that's what is cooking at our house.
Have a good day and for you enjoyment here is an email my sister sent to me that I laughed so hard I cried. I KNOW you will enjoy it too.
Love ya



Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one; a reassurance to those of us who fly routinely in our jobs. After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor.Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS ' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.

By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever,had an accident.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And the best one for last

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

Come on, you are crying right now aren't you!!

Missed Familiarity

I am in a melancholy mood tonight. A little drab. Here is what dictionary.com says about these two.

Melancholy: adjective- soberly thoughtful; pensive

Drab: noun- dull; cheerless; lacking in spirit, brightness, etc.

I was trying to figure that out too. Why? I really don't have the necessary descriptions associated with someone even to warrant the above definitions or a lot to make me sad or contemplative or a bunch of the other adjectives at dictionary.com. I think it has to do with missed familiarity. Now you are asking yourselves. What does that mean exactly? Good question.

Every night before bed we have a routine. One of the few routines that have stuck with us through that past year because of all the upheaval in our lives. We try to make bedtime for the girls somewhat routine. If not always at the same time at least the consistency of the pattern of preparing and going to bed has become routine or "familiar" if you will.

The routine goes like this usually without fail no matter where we are or whatever time we are going to bed, unless one of the noodles has fallen asleep ahead of time and it would wreck their world to be awakened, not to mention just plain cruel, we do the following.

Lili is first, we ask her if she has said goodnight to "Poppy" and if she has she climbs up on me to say her good nights to me. If she hasn't she goes to tell Poppy goodnight and tries to score some sort of treat so she will get cavities and oh, never mind. That USED to be what happened until we put a stop to that. Grandfathers have a tough time saying no sometime but I will hand it to Poppy, once we told him make sure she doesn't coax a cracker or piece of chocolate out of him, he sticks with NO. And many nights we understand that as Lili comes back into the room crying her little eyes out saying "Poppy said No!".

She climbs up onto me and we chat a little bit about the day. Sometimes I sing my our "Somebodies Sleepy" song to her. I wrote it for Aly and finished it for Lili. They both act like they don't like it, but I usually see a little curl of a smile break out. Lili especially likes to climb into my arms and say "baby". She loves for us to hold her like a little baby and rock and sing to her. It also takes up time and that is what she wants to do when it's bedtime anyway. But she does it other times in the day too so she really does like it and not just for wasting time.

I look at her and say OK let's kiss, and we give each other butterfly kisses, and then Eskimo kisses and then a lip kiss, and then I pray for her. I pray that she falls asleep quickly and that she doesn't have any bad dreams only beautiful, fun dreams. I pray that she sleeps all through the night and gets lots of rest for the next days business. And I pray that God would put his angels around us all to protect us from evil. Then we tell each other we love each other a billion gazillion times and she wanders to the bedroom where Mom goes through a routine with her in her special way.

While that is going on, IF she hasn't batted those gorgeous brown eyes at me and pulled her grip on me tighter around her finger, I will get Aly to go brush her teeth and if she is not already dressed for bed to get dressed. IF she has me in her cross hairs she may just sit by me and play on my laptop for about 30 minutes while Shelley is in with Lili. Aly loves to play on the computer. And I admit I truly enjoy the just "Aly and me" time that it provides. Of course I have to try to reduce my mentality to a 4 year old and try to enjoy putting 4 scoops of ice cream on bunny's cone or counting the number of bubbles of a certain color. But I get to watch my daughter laugh and learn and smile and just "be" beside me as I hold her. Moments that I know will all too soon disappear and I will long for them.

Usually after all of the playing on the computer and rounds of questions are asked of any particular subject, I make sure she has said goodnight to Poppy and then we go through our ritual of kissing and loving before she goes with Mom off to enjoy some special time with her before she goes to sleep.

For the past two nights I have missed the special kiss and love times and she has just gone onto bed. She of course has told her Mom that she said goodnight to me but I don't think it's because she doesn't want to kiss and love on me before she goes to bed. Who in their right mind could resist that?!!! ;-) I know it is because she has had two very, very early and busy and exhausting days these past two days. She is so tired by the nights end that she can hardly keep her eyes open and she is a complete grump bucket extraordinaire. I could hear her grumping as her Mom made her go to the potty before coming to bed. And I remembered we hadn't said our good nights but I understood how tired she was and I want her to go to sleep and get rest.

Regardless, I still missed out on the special moment of my little girl climbing up on me in my recliner and stretching out looking me in my eyes and telling me she loved me and kissing me with her eyelashes and her nose and her lips. I love just holding her and smelling her hair and knowing that I am her Daddy man and she is my little princess.

Then it hit me.That is how God must feel when I don't give him the attention he deserves. OK so I am reducing the creator of the universe to the emotions of a carnal minded man but nonetheless I still believe that He WANTS me to give Him that attention. That "from the heart" consideration that should be His always. I realize that God is sovereign and does not need anything but He still can want can't he? Isn't it apparent that He wants us to obey Him? To love him? After all His word says that it is not his desire that any should perish but that all should come to the saving knowledge of Jesus. Isn't that right? SO God can want. And I believe that he wants us to give him "special" attention that only we can give. After all isn't that why we were created? To give him praise and worship from a personal relationship? PERSONAL.?!

That is why I have felt melancholy or drab. I missed my special time with my little girl. Just imagine that if I missed this with my one little child, just think how God must feel when His children (born again believers) fail to give Him any attention at all.

Oh yeah, I know we pray to bless our food, and we pray and ask God for help when we need it and we praise Him when we hear of something good happening to our friends or family but what about the PERSONAL attention. I am surely guilty of it. I used to sing to God all the time. I would make up praise songs and even when they didn't rhyme or have that great a melody they were still from my heart. A true praise that I know He was please with.

If it's possible I would like to imagine being able to make God feel like I do when my girls are wanting to please me. You know by drawing a picture or doing something you have shown them to do. I wish I had a dollar for ever time my girls had said "Daddy, watch me!" I would be dictating this to my secretary who lived with us in our mansion.

Sometimes I want to pull my hair out, what's left of it, but I realize that those words will eventually fade too. Kind of like my initial excitement and love and desire for my Heavenly Father to watch me has faded too.

I pray that it comes back.

I believe it will and is.

I just know that my girls and my wife continue to teach me everyday how wonderful our God is. I am going to take some serious time to plan some butterfly kisses for my Abba.


How about you?

God's Perfect Timing

My heart is so full. I am re living the moment yesterday when my oldest, Aly asked Shelley and me about how to get her free gift. I believe she said something like " I think I am ready to get my free gift from God". I don't have to tell you how our hearts nearly exploded. We had a little discussion and I will try to sum it up for you so you might gain insight or have and opinion or give some leadership etc.

I have to admit my first thoughts were- No wait, if you do then the Lord might take you home. I know that sounds crazy but I was reminded of the tragedy of Steven Curtis Chapmans family. I know their little girl is in heaven but it is such a hard loss for them. Anyway, then all I could think of is that the rapture must be getting ready to happen or I was getting ready to die. Yeah, I know I really need therapy but I am just telling you what went through my mind in about a millisecond when I realized my child was wanting info on the single most important decision of her life.

We of course wanted to encourage her but we also wanted to make sure she understood what it was that she was wanting to do. At 4 1/2 years of age she is such a smart little person so understanding and inquisitive. I know she was comprehending a lot but I think she was just not ready quite yet. Which of course made me believe that I had talked her out of it but I knew that really wasn't the case. I think the Holy Spirit wants to iron out a few wrinkles first.

For example, Aly came running in the living room with her hands up close to her chest and ran right past us and on her way to her room which is highly unlike her unless she is going to the bathroom and you know she HAS to announce her potty visits as if someone may abduct her off of the throne if she doesn't tell us. Shelley noticed it at first and asked her where she was going and what she had in her hand. Well, she sheepishly stopped and looked that deer in the headlight look and just stood there as if she would disappear or we would forget what we had just asked if she was only still and very quiet.

Shelley asked her again and this time it had my interest peeked. Well, Aly just kind of stood there continuing to focus on her inner psychic abilities to make us forget what was going on. After some increased volume on our part and serious looks and forward sitting in our chair she opened her hands and showed us some coins, mostly pennies that she had picked up off of "Poppy's" room floor. Shelley asked her whether or not Poppy had given them to her and she shyly shook her head no. Praise God for honesty, we have seriously worked on that. Now it seems we were working on stealing. We had to make it plain to her that taking anything that doesn't belong to you without permission is in fact stealing. So she knew she was in for a spanking as we had just had this discussion two nights before when she had taken one of those little BP trucks that they sell around Christmas, well, she had taken it from Poppy's room to play with it in the kitchen and WITHOUT Poppy's permission.

When we moved here, Shelley's dad, Poppy as the girls call him, gave us the whole house except for one little room that he basically lives in. He said he didn't want anything else but that room and he wanted us to make sure that he could maintain his privacy. He made it plain that he loved us and the girls and wanted them to come to visit him often but not when the door was closed or when he wasn't home.



For the most part the girls honor this. Sometimes however, they get those 2 and 4 year old mind sets and forget about the rules and just play without thinking or care for the consequences of actions gone awry. We believe that this was one of those times. After all , Aly knows that Poppy would die for her and would give her the world if she asked for it and he could get it. Surely she understood that he would be glad to give her some spare change that had fallen on the floor.

We are confident that this was not a serious character issue that we should worry about. But it COULD become one if not handled properly. SO she knew that a spanking was in line with what we had determined just the other day... and she was not happy about that. But I felt the mercy of the Lord working through my little "pats" with a back scratcher to her behind with one good one at the end.

She was still very upset and I kind of noticed it was a different upset than one of a sore butt. She was genuinely sorry for what she had done. I could see the remorse in her face and her sadness at having disappointed me and Shelley and Poppy by doing something wrong like stealing.
SO I recognize this as the Holy Spirits refining time for Aly. She is very much aware that she has sinned. She knows what sinning is and she knows what forgiveness is. She also knows about Jesus and that "he died on the cross so that we don't have to die. " AND " three days later God grew him back to life". My personal favorite description of resurrection.

What an awesome God we serve who has planned out our salvation!!! He knew before he created the world the personality of this little child. That she would choose Him and they would know each other in a wonderful relationship for eternity. I look forward to praying the sinners prayer with my daughter, that is if I don't blubber like a baby myself. Right now I am about to lose it because I know that when that happens my little girl will miraculously become my sister also. What a wonderful mystery. I just am so thankful that she is asking and the Holy Spirit is working. YES even at 4 1/2 years old God can reach us and communicate the Good News of Jesus. Praise His Name!!!









Please pray for Shelley and me and especially Aly at this time of decision. That the timing will be perfect and that we will do what God wants us to. What am I saying, of course it will and He will and we will...His perfect will. Just remember to praise Him. He really deserves our praise!!!!!

Praise ye the LORD.

Praise God in his sanctuary:

Praise him in the firmament of his power.

Psalms 150:1

Love always,

Happy Birthday to Me !!

Hello dear friends. Thank you once again for sharing a few minutes of your busy day reading about my beautiful family and our experiences. What a really awesome thing the Internet is that allows us to share our lives electronically!

We celebrated my birthday (July 4Th) on Friday and I was blessed with what has become a tradition in our home. I am awakened by my beautiful daughters who are adorned in patriotic garb, topped off with red "do" rags. I get to kiss and love on them and add my "do" rag to the mix and we hug and love and take pictures and they give me cards and "sup-presents". It is a wonderful way to wake up, especially on your birthday.

I am also the beneficiary of a special "summer time" hat each father's day or birthday. This tradition was started even before we got our Aly and Lili. The girls at the children's home felt so sorry for me as I was burning my head each time we went to the beach or the pool so they would get a hat and decorate it for me, and then proceed to lose it for me at the beach or pool. You can't have anything. (I sound like my Ma.)

So you can see from the hat that it is not a fashion item but simply something to keep the sun out of your face and from burning your head. My Aly and Lili had a fun time decorating it and for me that is worth more that anything. Here they are trying to put it on my head.

We spent the rest of the day out by the pool, after eating our bar-b-que chicken and potato salad and other yummies. We saved my favorite birthday request cake, death by strawberries, for after our swim. Shelley outdid herself as usual.

I must admit that I never would have dreamed in my imaginings as I was growing up that I would be 47 years old and the father of a 2 1/2 year old and a 4 1/2 year old. It is really an amazing and awesome God we serve who gives us such blessings when we are so undeserving.

I hope if you have not read Shelley's blog you will. Our Aly presented Shelley with a very heart rendering question while we were swimming Friday. Shelley handled it very well.
I do so wish I could take away the pain that will ultimately come to my two wonderful children. I am sad to say that there is no way for me to do this. We must trust in Jesus to meet their need and lead them according to His plan, not ours. I know He will do a wonderful thing in their lives. He has already shown His miracle power so many times. We are so blessed to be the parents of these two little marvels.

Of course I am their daddy man so I can brag and brag but truthfully if you got to spend any time around them yourself you would too be amazed at their abilities and insights at such young ages. I would love to take credit however, I will simply say that God knows what he is doing and he certainly chose the right match with our family!

Thanks for stopping by and love to you and yours!

Salsa

Aly and I made salsa the other day. It was so fun using my birthday present early. My b-day is July 4th for those of you who don't know it. I am one of those men who if they see something they want they buy it themselves making it a lot harder for choosing a present for me. So, I went ahead and searched eBay for a food processor and won one for a great price and a new one at that. A Cuisinart and it works great. Of course the only reason I want it is to make salsa. Shelley may be the one who gets the most use out of it, but she wants one of those Vita mix thingies and they are super expensive. So unless we win the lottery or a rich relative dies and leaves us lots of dough ( and I don't mean the flour kind ) we will have to do with a blender and a my new Cuisinart.

Anyway, making our salsa was a fun job. Aly of course wanted to put everything in the processor and I was of course impatient and so we compromised on me cutting up the veggies and her putting them in. She wanted to operate the processor but I talked her out of it by mentioning that this was MY birthday present and it was only right that I should get to operate it by myself at least this first time. She agreed.

Salsa is one of those fun things you can use as an analogy for so many situations in life. I am choosing to relate it to our lives at any given moment. ANY ones life at any given moment. Take for instance our President George W. Bush. Isn't his life a constant example of salsa? No pun intended on the ethnic origin of the dish either. He is surrounded by all sorts of vegetables and spices and vinegar and herbs that are all trying to have their say in the mix of his decision making. And they all have their right to input however, some of them are more important than others. Like VP Dick Cheney would probably be the green peppers, and Secretary of State, Condolesa Rice would be an onion. Of course G.W. is the tomatoes. All the other herbs and spices, etc would be the other advisers that go into the mix. Hopefully a well balanced mix that turns into a very delicious concoction that pleases the senses especially the taste.


I know my life has certainly been a big bowl of salsa for a while now. I have had lots of different input by lots of spices and herbs in my world. I would have to say that my girls and Shelley would be my green peppers and onions. I of course am the tomatoes. In my salsa making experiences I have tried lots of different things to distinguish it from others I have tried. I have been successful and there have been times I have not. I think the one item I have discovered which doesn't necessarily distinguish it from others but is a mandatory item for me to consider it complete is cilantro. Not dried cilantro but fresh cilantro. And not too much, just the right amount that gives that extra special, yummyness to it. That and a secret ingredient that you might get Aly to tell you if you are ever around us when we are making it.
She reminds me of the dog on that baked bean commercial. You know, Duke who wants to tell everyone the secret family recipe. Aly would "spill the beans" so to speak. It is a common item but perhaps you never would have thought to add this to your recipe. If you have one.
Anyway, we made salsa. And the Cilantro? Well, it is my analogy for God. You see the salsa is not right unless it has His input, Hhis "spice" to our lives. And just the right amount. Not over done and not too little. ( we can argue later about whether or not you can get too much of God ).

I just know that without Him, my salsa is not complete.

How about you.

Made any salsa lately?

love,

Welcome Changes

My little 2 1/2 year old took a nap today while laying on my chest. As I think back on the time I remember wanting to be able to recall all of the emotion wrapped up in that special time so I could post it here for others to read but so that I could read it again and again. It was a wonderful experience that I had known before however this time was different.

I was different.

Lili had come to sleep with us last night which is a highly unusual event. We have tried it before mind you and it usually ends up with me cussing and Shelley saying "I told you so". I was the one who wanted to each time because of my guilty feelings of having Aly spend so much time with us. She has slept with us quite a bit of her young life and I feel that there is a special bond with us because of that. Of course there is a special bond with us because she is our first and a lot of other "firsts" that we have shared with her. And I was trying to satisfy that guilty feeling that perhaps we have not given enough of ourselves to Lili. Although there are other ways in which we have bonded with Lili that are different from our bonding with Aly. I guess it's a normal emotion.

Regardless, I remember Shelley bringing her into our room last night and putting her in the bed with us and she had had a "bad dream", so she was all too happy to be in our bed. Usually she likes to play and chatter box and gets herself awake until she just will not be quiet and calm down and go to sleep. Generally speaking she does not like sleeping with us and prefers her crib so that she can cover her head up and arrange her "posse" of stuffed animals and dolls for her morning parties. However, last night she climbed in the bed and smiled and covered up and settled down and we said our "good nights" again and she was off to visit the "sand man", thank God.

She awoke at the crack of dawn to the sounds of Shelley "cracking" the dawn. I swear there is an amazing God we serve that matches persons like Shelley and me who are opposites when it comes to their "fruitful" time of day. Shelley is a morning person, always has been, always will be. She will last as long as she can at night but then she is gone. Me I am a night person, always have been, always will be, unless aliens come and inhabit my body and change me. That or God does a number. He did when I worked at the Children's Home. But, I reverted to my old ways. Genetic I guess.

Anyway, Lili awoke before the Rooster (which is appropriate seeing as she was born in the year of the rooster) and decided to have a conversation with me. Which was NOT happening. SO I gently, yeah right, suggested that she go into the OTHER room to her Mommy and see if she could help her start the morning out right instead of missing a limb... just teasing.

So since she had gotten such an early start she was wiped out about middle of the day and I could easily tell she was ready for a nap, although she disagreed with me wholeheartedly. I knew right away this was going to take some convincing so I made her climb up into my lap and then began the process to calm her down with suggestions about how tired her hands were because they had worked so hard finding all those little pieces of Doritos in the bottom of that bag. And I do mean worked hard. She had been munching out on the last of a bag of chips and having a field day doing it. The tips of her fingers had turned orange as well as anything in which they came into contact. SO I grabbed a wet wipe (praise God for this invention) and began to wipe away the residue and orange "lipstick" that had deposited itself onto her skin.

We talked some more about how her feet were tired from running around the house all morning and how even her eyelids were so heavy and tired that she just had to close them so she could rest them for just a minute or two. To which she slowly succumbed and rested her head in the middle of my chest and listened to my heart beat and fell asleep... and snored. What a hilarious little snoring sound she can make when she falls asleep a certain way. She does it in her car seat sometime. Shelley and I love it.

I don't have to tell you how wonderful it was to hold my little girl and caress her head and hold her little bottom and just feel her warmth and know how much a miracle her presence there truly is. I just had to lift up a prayer of thanksgiving to God for bringing her into our life. What a magnificent miracle she has been to us. We have saved each other.

Needless to say, I of course joined her shortly thereafter in search of that sand man. I found him too, and he was all too happy to see me again. We have a special relationship he and I.

I mentioned in the beginning of this post at how I was different. There is no way you live through the experiences of the past year or two, survive them intact and not be a different person. I think I am different just recently from the release of stresses that were consuming me. I have goals more clearly defined and that for anyone but especially a man who is head of a home, is a wonderful thing. I look at my family a little differently than I did before. I still yell and have my grumpy moments but I believe they would all tell you that I am changing.

I would like to look at it as a "seasoning".

I hope we all like the flavor.

I believe we will.

God is a magnificent chef!

Love,

The Fern and the Bamboo

I appreciate all the kind words of encouragement I have received as a result of my last post. Thank you. I will try to share as I can and I certainly hope you will continue to stop by and read.

I pray perhaps something I empart will make your journey a little brighter and maybe you will laugh or cry, but I hope you will always remember to flush and wash your hands.

The Fern and the Bamboo

author unknown

One day I decided to quit....I quit my job, my relationship, my Spirituality...

I wanted to quit my life.

I went to the woods to have one last talk with God.

'God', I said. 'Can You give me one good reason not to quit?'

His answer surprised me...

'Look around', He said. 'Do you see the fern and the bamboo?

''Yes', I replied.

'When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I took very good care of them. I gave them light. I gave them water. The fern quickly grew from the earth. Its brilliant green covered the floor. Nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo.

In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and plentiful.

And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo'. He said.

'In the third year, there was still nothing fromthe bamboo seed. But I would not quit.

In the fourth year, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. But I would not quit.' He said.

'Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth. Compared to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant. But just 6 months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall. It had spent the five years growing roots. Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive. I would not give any of My creations a challenge it could not handle.' He said to me.

'Did you know, My child, that all this timeyou have been struggling, you have actually been growing roots? I would not quit on the bamboo. I will never quit on you. Don't compare yourself to others.' He said.

'The bamboo had a different purpose than the fern, yet, they both make the forest beautiful. Your time will come', God said to me. ' You will rise high!'

'How high should I rise?' I asked.

'How high will the bamboo rise?' He asked in return.

'As high as it can?' I questioned.

'Yes.' He said, 'Give Me glory by rising as high as you can.'

I left the forest and brought back this story. I hope these words can help you see that God will never give up on you... Never regret a day in your life.

Good days give you Happiness.

Bad days give you Experiences.

Both are essential to life.

Keep going...

Happiness keeps you Sweet,

Trials keep you Strong,

Sorrows keep you Human,

Failures keep you Humble,

Success keeps You Glowing,

But Only God keeps You Going!

Does anyone read this?

Hello to anyone reading this. Please post a response. I am deciding whether or not I should continue. It's kind of like cooking for one. Why go to all the trouble to make a five course meal when a tv dinner will suit.
If I do receive some comments that make me feel guilty or encourage me then I will stay the course and perhaps blog more often.
Anyway. After that last post, spooky pictures, I don't expect a lot of response.
Thanks for your time anyway
D

Proud Papa

Shelley and I celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary today. Yes we were married at Ancient City Baptist Church at 2:00 pm on May 6, 1995. It has been the adventure of a lifetime and I wouldn't change a thing. Through all our ups and downs and everything in between she is the love of my life and the mother of my two beautiful, amazing little girls and I love her more each passing hectic, frustrating day. I know she loves me too because she hasn't killed me yet.

We spent the day with our girls, just living life and being around them was a blessing.

I want to share a blessing with you.

For your viewing enjoyment here are several pictures of my heart. What a blessed man I am and I need to remind myself of this sometimes. There is no comparison to the love of a good woman and beautiful (inside and out) children.

We'll start off with my little bundle of joy, lady bug Lili. She loves her hats and she loves to laugh. Notice the red toenails to match her lady bug hat. She was SOOOO proud of these.

Here is our most recent performer for her children's choir performance at church. The "Obedient Bee" These children were SO good and of course every parent was bursting at the seems with pride. We were too and our little bee of course buzzed the brightest for us.

Of course these two are already best of friends and are going to be such all through their lives God willing. They do so love each other and enjoy playing together.

Just a cool picture I dabbled with a bit. I know I am partial but I think she is just beautiful.

And here is that famous lady bug hat again. It was originally bought for Aly and she has had a lot of fun with it. Now Lili loves it. But Aly won't be out done. She loves her sister but she has to have camera time too.

Here are my two little fashion mavens. They LOVE to play dress up and Aly loves to dress Lili and herself. Her tastes are truly eclectic and we LOVE it.

I just love this picture of Lili and her Mom.

She is practicing puffing her cheeks out for trumpet playing.

And here is Lili practicing her lip position for trumpet playing.

I'm telling you the girl is musical. I love this picture of Aly watching Lili.

And of course "madam smiles and drools a lot".

This little beat of my heart just looks good in anything.

Aly loves dress up and this is her last Fall Festival outfit of a little princess ballerina.

Her smile and laugh are so contagious and we thank God for that.

She is just growing up SOOOO fast. And gorgeous too!!

Sisters, -there were never such devoted sisters.

Here are the beginning shots of our acrobat.

Aly is climbing and jumping on everything these days.

She loves her Gymnastics class and it shows.

After all, its only a sofa and you can always get another one.

But shots of this little jumper are priceless.

Here our Aly is at her Gymnastics class. She is so attentive and good.

Of course I am going to say that.

Did I mention how smart and beautiful she is?

Olympics?


A Lili sandwich.

All my beauties together.

Lili loves to imitate Aly and her gymnastics stuff.

She especially loves to rock in her Mom's recliner.

Here she is having a fun time.

And she knows we don't approve of the super power rock that they LOVE to do in the chair,

so she loves to give me that coy little "please?!!!" look.

And of course it NEVER works.

Yeah right.

Who could deny such a lovable face as this?

See what I mean? But I love it. Am I blessed or what?!!!!

Thank you God for the blessing of my family.